Friday, December 30, 2005

King Kong Is a Lesbian?

They all scream in terror. The huge ape is menacing and aggressive. Are they screaming in fear? Or are they screaming because the huge ape has a huge ape cock?

In the film King Kong, there is never any proof given that King Kong is, in fact, male. The average audience assumes that the ape must be male. He is after all violent, agressive, loud, rude, and in love with a female.

But what if....
What if...

King Kong was actually QUEEN KONG!

(I must admit that I have seen worse looking Lesbians at the gays bars I have frequented in Regina, Saskatchewan, so it is not out of the realm of possibility.)

What were are left with is a very subversive film, that would probably not just be condemned for it's lesbianism, but also for beastiality, which I remind you, was never a considered a criticism in any of the versions of the film that have been made to date.

Lesbiansim implies homosexuality. Homosexual romance, unlike heterosexual romance, implies sex. Therefore lesbian homosexual romance, must mean that sex is involved which would conclude the taboo act of bestiality. ("WON'T SOMEONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?")

So if you venture out to see this season's holiday hit, King Kong, use your imagination and watch the greatest lesbian love story ever told!