Stressed By My Stressed

In an effort to "know thyself" following the wise words of Socrates, I eventually come to terms with the limit of what I can know about how and why I function. The subconcious, which arguably exists in every human being, is that which is always out of reach; that which can not be explained (at least through language). Only in particular circumstances does our subconscious make itself known consciously. It seems that these days, between school, work, teaching, hosting my parents, while balancing my social life, my subconscious processes are making themselves known. Yet, by revealing it's presence, my subconscious is evading explaining itself on conscious (linguistic) terms.

My voice is psycho-somatically absent. My mother contends that the presence of her and my father has caused stress in my life that is making itself known, subconsciously, through the loss of my voice. Similar to the case of Dora and her hysteria, I propose that, because of my parents presence in my life, I have in some way become censored. This metaphorical "loss of voice" is making itself known in my physiology through an actual loss of voice. The subconsciouis makes itself known through a "reading" of the biological behaviour of my body.

What is there to be done? My subconscious has made it self adequately known, but has not explained the meaning of it's presence. There must be some cause for my psycho-somatic symptoms. Is my self-diagnosis sufficient? Could these be the real cause, or merely the cause I wish upon myself for my loss of voice? Are there other factors at play?

Can the mysteries of the subconsicous ever be answered in any detail?

The stress of my stress makes me want to up and vomit.

The paradoxical product of the psyco-somatic symptoms of the subconsious is that they add to the problem, they increase the level of stress in one's life, rather than help diminish it.