Everyone seems to go to Europe or Austrailia to "Find themselves". I find this false and futile. To assume that there is a pre-destined self that needs to be found, and only can be found by traversing a specific journey to a certain geographic place is foolish. The self is not "pre-destined" but is made up of the myriad of experiences we accumulate. It is foolish to assume we can put value on these experiences. A trip to Europe may ultimately less influential than not going anywhere at all. There is an inevitability to any experience being a formative force in our lives. And the actual "self" we are is constant and ever shifting. We are always ourselves, so how is it possible then to find the self that we already are. That self changes as we accumulate experience. I often think that the efforts to "find oneself" abroad is an attempt to take control of formative experience. It is choosing the experiences we desire to make up our identity. That being said, I have lost myself in N.Y.C. I'm off to find me!
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This is a bit of a mess, but here goes.
What I think about “Going to find yourself”:
When people ask us "who we are," we usually respond with "I'm Paul," "I'm Canadian," “I'm a student," “'I'm a member of my family," "I'm the friend of so-and-so," "I'm the boyfriend of so-and-so," "I'm a student at such-and-such," "I do this for a living," “I’m white,” “I’m a man,” or other things we do, people we have relationships with, and the institutions of which we are members: in short, the differing identities that we inhabit and through which we define who and "what" we “are." When you go to another country (usually) most of these "identities" (more accurately, the ways, the methods, the systems of meaning, the contexts through which, and within which, we acquire, and maintain identity -- the discourses to which we are subject) disappear or massively shift. What you are left with is "you," without all the "things" that usually go into making "you" "you." So, when we leave our home, our friends, our lives and go to another place, we are going, in a way, to find ourselves; ourselves sans all the "things" through which we usually define our self. That’s what I think people mean when they say they are going to find “themselves,” which is, I agree, a bit of a misnomer. We are going to see how who and what we think we are acts (or performs) in another place; seeing how that place might change us. This does not mean that I believe in some essential and unchanging “self”; rather, we are shaped by our experiences, we are, in “essence” what we “do,” and by “doing” in an entirely new context we will change (discover?) who we think we are, and who we will become. That’s enough of that for now.
My favourite movie taglines are the ones that say stuff like: "she went to England to find her dog, she ended up finding herself."
Of those experiences you allude to, none of them compare to the experience of travelling abroad. It's about removing yourself from your environment, your daily routine, everything you know and take for granted. It's going somewhere where no one knows you, where no one's trying to change you or tell you who you are, where you can't be defined by anything, by anyone. It's about immersing yourself in a completely different culture and meeting brand new people with drastically different backgrounds and values than yourself. Being out of your element. Sometimes you just need step outside of what you know in order to properly assess your life and the direction it's taking. That's something you can't experience where you are.
But how many people actually know where they come from to begin with?
Canada, where I reside, is huge geographically and very diverse. Not in the intuitive multi-cultural sense, but in the vast regional disparity that exists from Coast to Coast to Coast. Within each province, there are several different "cultures" that exist. It seems to be a very "Canadian" experience to travel abroad, but I would assume (and probably correctly), that very few of these young Canadians have experienced Canada outside of their home town or province. There are plenty of benefits from removing yourself from a familiar context in order to learn more about yourself. But there is also plenty to be learned about oneself by becoming more accquainted the place where we call home.
Who's the say that Canada IS home? How can you define home? Is it the place you were born and are accustomed to? Or is it somewhere else, somewhere that makes you FEEL at home? How can you know unless you go out and explore? With another, what, 60 years of life left, why limit yourself to one country?
Besides, if you're going to search for youself, go big or go home (oops, that word again). The cultural differences between Newfoundland and Alberta do not compare to those between North America and South American and Europe and Asia....
Note: "there is also plenty to be learned about oneself by becoming more accquainted THE PLACE WHERE WE CALL HOME."
Where we call home isn't necessarily where we come from. That being said, where we come from in a geo-political sense does influence who we are. So why is finding out why we are different from the rest of the world more valuable then discovering why we are similar? Maybe if we could learn to see the similarities that connect all humanity, and be less concerned with the modern quest of self-actualization through individualization, the world would be a better less selfish place. That being said, I do not deny the benefits of travelling abroad, but I think there are more places that need to be explored, ones home for instance, or where one comes from (they can be different places) than merely foreign territory. I would argue there is limitless foreign territory to be discovered no matter your locale, it just takes imagination and patience and care to discover it.
It is not an either or question, but, instead, it should be a question of exploring home AND abroad.
Question: For those of you who claim that travelling abroad helped reveal who you are to yourself, who would you be or how would you understand yourself if you never went away? Would you remain un-actualized and unaware, or would you have found a different route to the same (identical) destination?
I vehemently disagree with Anonymous, having travelled extensively abroad.
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